The Six Rules of Gaming Christmas!


This Christmas, please consider your gift carefully. A games console may seem like the ideal present, but please ensure that the recipient will be comfortable with the responsibility you bestow upon them.

Article by Andy Pryer - follow him on Twitter here: @clammylizard

Many gaming devices are gifted each year and the sad truth is that most are abandoned. Some in a matter of days, while some are heartlessly cast aside after several years of faithful service.

Christmas Crap Gaming 14

All Christmas mornings are exciting, but the ones that include games consoles will be special forever, if judged correctly, as you introduce life-long companionship into their lives. Video games can make wonderful companions to the right owners and if their circumstances permit.

If, after very careful consideration, you do decide to make the gift of an electronic gaming device, avoid these common causes of rejection and abandonment:

1. Beware the granny trickers. There are many counterfeit consoles available from less reputable sources. The Polystation 2, Super Megason IV, X Game 360 or Game Joy is not on anyone's Christmas list and will be in the bin before the leftover turkey curry.

Christmas Crap Gaming 2

Christmas Crap Gaming 1

2. Ensure the recipient is a seasoned gamer. Casual gamers may give a current generation console a reasonable home for a few years, but they'll show it a total lack of respect by throwing the box in the recycling on day one! If you witness such behaviour we'd urge you to intervene: save the box if possible and reclaim the console and entrust it to someone who you're certain will give it a loving home for the rest of its life.

3. Obsolescence Is a major cause of neglect. The console could be the best thing since autosave on Xmas morning, but come birthday time, a new flavour of the month could enter and pull all the attention, leaving your gift to collect dust on the sidelines. Ensure your lucky recipient has a strong sense of nostalgia to ensure the console will get frequent exercise despite new members to the gaming family.

4. Your recipient’s heart may be in the right place and they may be willing to devote an appropriate amount of time to ensure the console feels loved, but these good intentions cannot compete with the lure of the girlfriend. If the recipient of the console is female then this point can be disregarded: no boyfriend ever wanted his girlfriend to stop playing video games, with the exception of Candy Crush.

5. Deliberate vandalism or unintended abuse by siblings must also be considered. It's quite common to find a fish finger sandwich in a NES cartridge port or a congealed beef burger in a PlayStation’s CD drive. Before you give a console to someone with younger brothers or sisters, ensure that either the security measures are adequate to prevent any devious acts, or that the siblings are adequately fearful of reprisal that they wouldn't dare commit any sabotage.

6. Although this is by far the most unlikely cause of console abandonment, the burden of maturity strikes some players and they mistakenly believe that they have outgrown the playing of videogames. These deluded and unfortunate souls deserve our pity and support above all else. Until their counseling can take effect, it's unfair for the console to be neglected. Please consider whether in your opinion, the recipient is likely to be prone to these torrid delusions.

Article by Andy Pryer - follow him on Twitter here: @clammylizard

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